I sure didn't imagine this happening so soon.

It's 11pm and I'm up, sleepless, because Little Guy is coming back to us tonight! I did not expect this, not now. I knew the possiblity was high of it happening down the road, if/when his needs became too much for a cognitively challenged mom to handle. But four months after he went back home to mom? Geez. I found this out not from the after-hours caseworker calling, but from Patty (mom) herself!

We called Patty so Big Guy could say goodnight to her, and she asked to speak with me and let me know she called the CPS 800 number tonight and told them she was overwhelmed and couldn't handle things. She wanted to know if we could take the baby. Does she know what she's doing? That she may have put one of the final nails in the coffin when it comes to getting Big Guy back? That CPS isn't going to remove and return Little Guy over and over indefinitely before they take him away for good? Who knows. More on this later. For now, I am filled with a mixture of sadness (for Patty), happiness (to see the boys reunited) and total overwhelm (at the thought of suddenly being a parent to two children, after 4 months of barely being able to handle one). Big Guy is doing really well right now, and I think having Little Guy here will be great for him but suddenly having to share the attention may also cause some regression. We'll see.

We don't know when they'll get here, so I'm going to try to grab a few winks while I can. Tomorrow I need to go to our storage unit and pull out all the 18-24 months clothes I put away there just last week when we finally took Little Guy's stuff out of the kids' room to make more space for Big Guy's toys.

Please wish us luck! We're about to embark on a serious rollercoaster - Two brothers of two very different ages, with two different dads who may continue to drop in and out of the picture, with one very challenging but sweet mom, and with two very different sets of needs.